|
|
|
January 30, 2004
 Content: • Frequently Asked Questions Frequently Asked Questions Announcing your engagement When you decide to marry, you and your fiancee should first inform both of your parents, preferably in person. If your families don't already know each other, they should be introduced as soon as possible. Generally the bride’s parents are responsible for the announcement, either by sending a release to the local newspaper, at an engagement party, or both. An engagement party is an excellent way of telling relatives and friends before your engagement is printed in the local newspaper. Check with local and hometown newspapers about their requirements for engagement announcements. Your engagement should be announced within one year. Invitations The bride's family determines the number of guests. They should, however, consult the groom and his family before determining the number of guests. The groom and his family is entitled to invite one-half of the total. Less is permissible and usually the outcome. Who is invited? Usually it is only close friends and family. Business acquaintances are not invited unless the wedding is extremely large. If all friends are not invited, wedding announcements should be mailed within two days after the wedding. Who should your wedding list include: Those who receive invitations to the wedding. Those who receive wedding and reception invitations. Those who will receive wedding announcements after the wedding. When to mail invitations Wedding invitations are sent out approximately four weeks prior to the wedding. Informal wedding invitations should be short personal notes, telegrams, or telephone calls. If an engagement is broken, all gifts should be returned, unless they were of a perishable nature. Legally the engagement ring is yours, but tradition calls for you to return it. Your wedding—professionals or not? For either a formal or informal wedding, there is no substitute for a professional. It is very necessary that you have made certain decisions and arrangements before consulting with any professional firm. You need to know your budget, the style of your wedding (formal, semi-formal, informal), the date and time of your wedding, the location, number of guests, attendants and fabric swatches for color coordinating. Formal weddings Very Formal Evening — Large ceremony after 6 p.m. Very Formal Daytime — Large ceremony noon to late afternoon. Formal Evening — After 6p.m., smaller than Very Formal Formal Daytime — Usually in the morning or early after-noon. Semi-Formal Evening — Small ceremony, often home or garden. Semi-Formal Daytime — Small ceremony, often home or garden. Wedding expenses — who pays what? The bride's family is entirely responsible for the wedding ceremony. The groom’s family may offer to share in the cost of the reception, and the bride’s family may accept, especially if the groom’s share of guests outnumber the bride’s. The bride and her family pay for: The Reception Flowers for the Church and Reception Flowers for the Bridal Attendants The Bride's Outfit and Trousseau Bridal Photographs for the Wedding and Engagement Music at the Church and Reception Fees for Sexton, Organist and Choir Groom's Wedding Ring Limousine for the Bride and other necessary cars for transportation Groom's Gift Gifts for the Bridal Attendants Invitations and Announcements Bride's Personal Stationery Any Related Equipment for Wedding and Reception Lodging for out-of-town Bridesmaids The groom and his family pay for: Bride's Engagement and Wedding Rings Complete Wedding Trip Gifts for Best Man and Ushers Lodging for out-of-town Ushers Boutonnieres Gloves or Ties needed for Men of Wedding Party Marriage License Clergyman's Fee (You should inquire — fees differ) Wedding Gift for Bride Optional Expenses Attendants' dresses are usually bought by each woman, the bride may provide them if she wishes. Corsages for mothers and grandmothers are usually provided by the bride for her own mother and grandmother. The bride's bouquet, which is usually a gift from the groom, may be purchased by the bride’s family. Rehearsal dinner, usually given by the groom's family, may be given by the bride’s family or friends. Bachelor's dinner is given by groom or his family, may be given by the bride’s family and or friends. The wedding rehearsal All weddings with more than two attendants should be rehearsed two or three days prior to the event, at the convenience of the clergyman officiating. If there are any child attendants such as a flower girl or ring bearer they can practice walking down the aisle. Rehearsals are most often held in the evening, preceded or followed by a rehearsal party. This would be an ideal time to present your attendants with any gifts you have selected for them, expressing your thanks for sharing your special day. The day of your wedding The number one rule is 'DO NOT PANIC." No matter how well you have planned, you may find that something unexpected happens. Don't share the problem with everyone, talk with the professional responsible or have someone in charge of the "unexpected’ items that happen. Always allow extra time for any difficulties. You can borrow your mother’s wedding band, the license can be signed anytime. No matter what happens or who does what, remained poised and beautiful. This is your special day, so relax and remain calm. You must continue with your ceremony except in dire emergencies. Second weddings There is only one rule of thumb for second marriages: "It is your wedding day and may be as formal or informal as you would prefer." Any color or style, including white for your gown is appropriate. The number of attendants is also optional. Your children may also be included as members of the wedding party. All options and rules of etiquette are available to you. Your honeymoon The word honeymoon literally means "Moon of Honey." There is some historic significance in this, in that Europeans drank a special beverage, a honey wine, for a month after the wedding — hence the "Honeymoon." The place and duration of the honeymoon will depend on the time available to you and your future spouse and your financial resources. This is usually the groom's expense, unless a honeymoon trip has been provided as a gift by either or both parents. Returning from your honeymoon Notify your parents and family that you are home. Invite them to dinner. Don't forget to thank them for all their help and cooperation that went into planning your wedding day Change all addresses if needed, such as: driver's licenses, credit cards, insurance policies, etc. This also includes changing your name on any necessary licenses, credit cards and policies. Notify any business associates of any changes in name and address. Select your wedding photographs. Have a party inviting members of your wedding party to view your wedding and honeymoon pictures. Check your wedding gifts. If you find that you have received duplicates, or ones that aren't quite to your taste, return them immediately. Work out a budget on a weekly and monthly basis. Discuss with each other and a lawyer the need for insurance, such as homeowner's insurance, health benefits and maternity benefits on your medical insurance.  RETURN TO TOP |
) ) ) ) ) |
|
|
